“The Other”

A photo that I took in the center of Bordeaux at Place Gambetta .

A photo that I took in the center of Bordeaux at Place Gambetta .

When you enter a small get together and know almost no one, you are “the other.” When everyone is on the same page, and you’re behind, you’re “the other.” When everyone knows the lyrics and you don’t, you’re “the other.” And when you find yourself wandering in a country where everyone but you knows the language and the culture, you are, surely, “the other.” Only in this case, you can’t simply get to know the small party of mutual friends, or read ahead when you have a free minute, or memorize the lyrics. So, now what?

Now you wait. Wait and live and learn. You can’t possibly think you’ll fit in. You’re like an ice cube in a pot of boiling water: same substance but from different environments. Only humans aren’t as pure as water. We are more complex, and while the ice cube will become one with the boiling water, a foreigner will always have those moments where he or she feels a bit different. Even those who immigrated at a young age might feel displaced at times.

Now, what does this have to do with studying abroad? Study abroad students are the foreigners, they are “the others.” And like any foreigner, when someone feels “out of their comfort zone” (as many people like to call the feeling when recounting their abroad experiences), they are actually doing two things: 1) learning about another culture, and 2) understanding their own culture.

I have recently come to realize that if you grow up in a society, you might not know how rooted in it you really are. Sure, there are certain things you don’t agree with and that you detest, but they are familiar. You may know what is polite, what is unacceptable, and when to say “excuse me.” You know how to exist there. Living in a foreign town, you may see just how rooted you are in your culture. But you realize this through another one. In other words, being “the other” might just help you learn about “the self,” yourself.



  1. fredonnezmoi · February 24, 2013

    Loved reading your post. Thank you for it. Cheers, Michel.

  2. Pingback: Top Five Favorite Blogs I read this past week | The Culture Monk
  3. rose · February 24, 2013

    that’s true, and well pointed out. Sort of like seeing yourself objectively, if there was such a thing.

  4. Madly Love · February 25, 2013

    Great post! I truly relate as an American living in Thailand. I’ve been living in Thailand for four months in a small town and being the “other” has truly helped me get more in touch with myself than ever before. Thank you for posting!

    • shajrulla · February 27, 2013

      Good Lucky Madly !

  5. Bartle · February 25, 2013

    Reblogged this on The Start.

  6. thecommunitytalks · March 1, 2013

    “You know how to exist there.” Maybe this is how you know where you are “from”? Of course, you can learn how to exist in many places. And so, perhaps one can be from many places: identity as something expandable, perhaps.

  7. Pingback: What does it mean to be out of place? | The Community Talks
  8. enhillstrom · March 2, 2013

    Awesome! I really enjoyed your analogy between studying abroad and being an ice-cube in boiling water. What’s interesting to think about is how often I feel like that in my own Country… Perhaps I belong somewhere else? In any case, I plan on studying abroad at some point in my college career and I’ll definitely be thinking about this analogy while I’m there. (Wherever “there” may be.)

  9. nylonnervous · March 3, 2013

    Could the concept of “other” be used to describe loss of identity?

    Even having immigrated to a country that prides itself in its multiculturalism at a young age, I still feel like an “other”. I grew up having identified myself as an immigrant and consequently have absorbed the label into my identity, while at the same time I regrettably only have rudimentary notions of my origins as I have spent the most of my life here.

  10. Shannon · March 4, 2013
  11. venustribes · March 9, 2013

    Thoughtful article, Shannon, enjoyed reading it. Check out this clip if you like. ‘alone’
    from film maker Vince Lee

  12. Yeahthtsme · March 12, 2013

    Congrats! Just wanted to say, some great words there.Like your take on being ‘the other’ . Awesome post.

  13. Pingback: The Diary format | It's all kids stuff.
  14. followingindigo · March 16, 2013

    Reblogged this on Following Indigo.

  15. visafacile · December 25, 2013

    Reblogged this on http://www.visa-facile.com and commented:
    Goog blog !

    Visa team


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